Monday, February 11, 2008

Facebook Wishes It Knew How to Quit You


So, Facebook. Ya know, that social-networking website that seemingly every man, woman, and child (but no pedophiles!) is a member of? The one that's inexplicably worth $15 billion, even though it brings in only about $60 million a year, none of which is real profit? The one whose ad-sales practices are kinda creepy (OK, let's be fair -- really, really creepy)? The one whose founder (who may have stolen the idea for the site anyway), in a delightful twist of irony, sued a magazine for violating his privacy?

Well, it keeps getting better and better! It turns out that once you join, you can't really un-join. Sure, you can deactivate your profile, but all the information from it is stored indefinitely on Facebook's servers (and can still be accessed). And deactivation is a far cry from deletion. Even after Nipon Das supposedly got his profile deleted, which took two months and the threat of legal action, people were still able to find his mostly blank profile and email him through it. As Das, a director at a Manhattan biotechnology firm who is apparently much more clever and witty than one would expect the director of a biotechnology firm to be, says: "It's like the Hotel California. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

So remember that time you got really drunk and joined the group "I've secretly watched my mom shower"? You can try to hide that, but it's never really going away (partially because it seems like maybe you have deeper issues, and partially because Facebook won't let it). And when you graduated from college and deactivated your profile so prospective employers wouldn't see the pictures of you passed out under a table at Denny's with a vagina drawn on your face? Guess what -- it's still there!

Everything you've ever done on Facebook -- every Wall post, every group you've joined, every friend you've poked -- will never go away. How long until the Patriot Act requires that all Americans must sign up for Facebook? I'll put the over/under at five years. Let the betting begin.


How Sticky Is Membership on Facebook? Just Try Breaking Free

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Trent had that penis on the side of his face. He's been forced to work at Carl's Jr. ever since. "Why don't you look at yourself in the mirror...your pathetic!" God that was AWESOME!